Tuesday, September 30, 2014
September 30 Chapter 41 v 7 v 8 TWELVE STEPPING WITH STRENGTH FROM THE PSALMS
All who hate me whisper about me ,imagining the worst ."He has some fatal disease,"they say "He will never get out of that bed!" Source : ( Gods big Book )
Step 5 - Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
My first couple of weeks of sobriety placed me in a holding cell . Isolation was my way of staying safe and holding onto my first couple of days of sobriety for dear life . The verse from the psalm was describing to perfection what I kept repeating in my head. The voices of self hounded me relentlessly . I know now my biggest enemy was me. . I fed my inner demon for sixteen years . Isolation at this point in my life was a path of self discovery and examination.I remember laying in a ball for twenty four hours or more it felt like a year .Death in my mind was coming the pain was excruciating the tears and the sweat poured from body like a river . Guilt discouragement fear and shame kept me down and I had nothing left . Life at this point was ending or at least the one I was living . Somewhere in my isolation I discovered freedom .If only I could get up and get out of this awful place .
Galatians 5 :1
For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.