Monday, April 20, 2015

men for Sobriety, Inc.
"Whatever I need I can find it, feel it,
keep it or release it."


“The best way of removing negativity is to laugh and be joyous.”  -David Icke

“The world is full of a lot of fear and a lot of negativity, and a lot of judgement.  I just think people need to start shifting into joy and happiness.  As corny as it sounds, we need to make a shift.”  -Ellen DeGeneres

“It’s your outlook on life that counts.  If you take yourself lightly and don’t take yourself so seriously, pretty soon you can find the humor in our everyday lives.  And sometimes it can be a lifesaver.”  -Betty White

“Negativism is an overall feeling, an overall attitude.  It is an attitude that can dominate us to the exclusion of all other feelings.  It keeps us from being positive about any facet of our lives, and it rules us above any other feelings.”  -Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D., WFS Program Booklet

Statement #2, “Negative thoughts destroy only myself.”
My first conscious sober act must be to remove negativity from my life.

Karen’s Perspective +
     This last week has been intense for me, both physically and emotionally.  I began the week acknowledging the hard work that I have accomplished and having our kitchen remodeled.  The thrill early in the week gave way to an uncomfortable yet welcoming repeat 6 month mammogram and ultrasound.  I walked out of the hospital on cloud nine...feeling gloriously happy, relieved and content.  I am proud of the way I handled myself.  I felt my 4C shining brightly.
     Many women have repeat testing done and this was my first adventure into this unknown avenue.  When I first received the news last fall that I would need a repeat, my mind immediately went into a familiar spiral of negativity.  What would happen next?  Was it cancer?  When will I know?  Why does six months take so long to get here but Christmas come so incredibly fast?  STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!!!
     In quiet moments with myself, I brought out Statement #2 and I needed it.  For years and years I had traveled the route of panic and pressure and I was not going to let this negativity flourish.  I armed myself with positivity and I did not allow myself to dwell on something I had no answer to. Whenever commercials for anything cancer-related appeared on TV, I turned my mind to OFF and affirmed myself.  I knew nothing, so I was not going to worry.  I would worry when I had a reason to worry.  Anytime a stressful thought jumped in, I turned to my strength and encouraged myself. Each time I felt worked up, I worked in healthy and healing thoughts.
     As the time came closer to my six month follow-up, I felt agitated and uneasy.  I brought out Statement #12 and decided that no matter what was going to happen, I would be able to move through it.  After all, I am a 4C woman!
     WFS provides a guide for any situation, experience or feeling.  Repeat mammogram? Statement #2.  Feeling doubtful?  Statement #12.  Whatever I need I can find it, feel it, keep or release it.  Hugzzz, Karen 
  • How do you respond to negative thinking? 
+  Dee’s Insights  +
     Hi 4C Women, I’ve had a lot of practice with conquering negative thinking since the beginning of the year.  I kept trying to turn around the negative thoughts every time I went to the doctor, filled another prescription, experienced physical pain or thought about my daughter and her severe health problems.  If it wasn’t for the years of practicing the WFS statements, I might have been stuck in my bed with the covers over my head for a very long time.  Trust me, there were and are days when I cry because I also believe in expressing my feelings rather than holding them in. What I know is that WFS has taught me that negative thoughts are temporary and are an honest response to a person or situation.  Being aware of this has been the best lesson.  I can have a negative thought but I don’t have to live in it until I am either triggered or beat down for days. That brings me to having negative thoughts about those who have harmed or hurt me - the person response.  That might be the most difficult to overcome.  I know forgiveness is the key and it is the one that requires a lot of introspection, continuous hard work and remembering that this kind of negativity certainly does harm me and not the person I’m pretty angry with, even if I feel it is justified.  I fluctuate between being assertive and forgiving.  I feel if I am assertive, then I protect myself from letting the hurtful words be a personal attack and am grateful that I am not that angry person.  Other times, I make a decision that I need to forgive that person so I can let it go. Perhaps it also has a lot to do with the relationship.  It might be easier to forgive an acquaintance than a loved one.  The most important thing for me is that if I would allow negative thoughts to linger too long, I know they would take me to a dark place where I would be living in the past with all its regrets and pain.  This is why I love Statement 2 and the knowledge that negative thoughts destroy only myself.  Now why would I want to do that?  –Dee
Thank you, Karen and Dee, for your words of courage and strength to overcome those negative thoughts!  ~Becky Fenner, WFS Director 
Email:   *   Tel215-536-8026   *   Fax:  215-538-9026   *

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