Women for Sobriety, Inc. "...happiness is obtainable when you work at creating it." ҉  “It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness.” -Charles Spurgeon “Be happy for this moment.  This moment is your life.”  -Omar Khayyam “Happiness is not something ready-made.  It comes from your own actions.”  -Dalai Lama “Happiness depends upon ourselves.”  -Aristotle *************************************************** Statement #3, “Happiness is a habit I will develop.” Happiness is created, not waited for. *************************************************** +++++++++++++++++++ + Karen’s Perspective + +++++++++++++++++++      Happiness, in my life today, consists of openness, activity and, surprisingly, even release.  In the past, I tried to find it elsewhere, in relationships, material things, in activities and especially in alcohol.  I recall feeling confused; what had once brought happiness instead brought guilt, shame and deep emotional turmoil.  My life was chaotic and impulsive with genuine happiness elusive.      Eight years ago today I chose to create happiness, even though I had no idea which way to turn or which way to go.  It was the beginning of my New Life and what is even greater than being sober eight years is the many changes that I have gone through.  WFS is the binding that provides a never ending course to follow.  I feel connected to life and to myself, not some stranger in the mirror.  I like and love who I see, who I am today.      Clueless as to what sobriety would bring in my life, I set out on this path of discovery.  I was (still am) relearning myself.  I was finding my likes (many) and dislikes (not so many) while growing into happiness.  It was challenging at first.  I felt so empty initially; but, no one else knew (how could they?) what brought feelings of happiness out in me, so I was akin to an explorer ...and began to uncover myself.  Layers of sadness and pain began to fall away and I began to glow inside.      I have so much in my life today.  Material things, although nice, no longer define me.  Sobriety and discovery are my first priority always.  No matter what a day holds, I can walk into genuine happiness at anytime, anywhere.  Of course, sobriety is not the eraser of problems and challenges; but, I do have the emotional stamina and skills to move through discomfort and learn from it.      Habitual happiness?  Yes, from planned goals and dreams to surprising and stunning moments happiness surrounds me, twirling and dancing in every direction!  Hugzzz, Karen Are you making happiness habitual? +++++++++++++++ +  Dee’s Insights  + +++++++++++++++      Hi 4C Women, Happiness, that elusive emotion we all seek.  Karen expressed it so well when she said that material things, although nice, no longer define her.  There was a time when I envied those with what seemed an abundance of money, perfect families, perfect life.  Those were the outside appearances that I judged happiness by and, no matter how blessed my life was, I couldn’t get past the “perfect” life of others.  Jealousy and envy were my main emotions and those led to feelings of inadequacy and anger for what I didn’t have.      It is amazing to realize that I have less now (material wise) and yet I am happier than I ever thought possible.  I still experience times of sadness, fear and anger but that is usually related to relationships that need mending and I know it is a work in progress or being physically in pain and fear starts tugging at my emotions.  Yet the foundation of peace and contentment helps me know that these situations are temporary and I am in a much better place in coping with them.      Alcohol won’t ever make relationships heal or myself for that matter.  It is not always easy being responsible for my thoughts and my actions yet it is a lot better than living in regret and shame.  For me, the most important part of Statement #3 is the action part - happiness is created, not waited for.  I put a huge burden and an impossible one, on expecting others to make me happy.  Talk about feeling powerless over my own life!  This Statement made a phenomenal impact on my attitude and is always a wonderful reminder of how empowering the WFS program is and knowing that happiness is obtainable when you work at creating it. –Dee _________________________ Thank you, Karen and Dee, for your words of encouragement and inspiration to start off our week! ~Becky Fenner, WFS Director Email:  newlife@nni.com   *   Tel: 215-536-8026   *   Fax:  215-538-9026 http://www.womenforsobriety.org   *   http://www.wfscatalog.org