Recovery Connections Network

Monday, July 31, 2017

"The game of life is the game of boomerangs. Our thoughts, deeds and words return to us sooner or later, with astounding accuracy." -Florence Shinn

“You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you." -James Allen

“Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one's thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.” -Goethe

Long before I had ever heard of WFS, I began to practice Statement #5. Where or when this happened is not as important as the fact that it happened. Thoughts of sobriety slowly began to enter my mind, and while these initial thoughts brought about anxiety and deep fear, they also brought an inkling of relief. This was the beginning and first glimpse of sobriety and a beautiful new way of life.

Statement #5 in action provides a portal for possibility. No matter the thought, action can sprout from within, just as Jean Kirkpatrick states in our Program Booklet: “First the thought, then the reality.” Sobriety and recovery grows and flourishes with thoughts that are tended to in a 4C garden. When this soil is enhanced with such nutrients as caring and compassion, a foundation for unlimited growth is unearthed.

Tending to this fresh and bountiful garden requires daily effort; planting seeds of joy, balance and independence, managing those pesky negative or doubtful weeds when they crop up and gently watering the blossoming bed with life sustaining love, produce a variety of continuing growth and flowering moments that are available to harvest for a lifetime. How do you tend to your growing garden of recovery? Hugzzz, Karen

Hi 4C Women,

This morning the message in my church was on joy and contentment. As I sat there, I thought about how much my life was changed because of the WFS program. It is through the Statements that I learned to build a much needed foundation of peace and contentment. As we all know, sobriety/being clean is not a promise of a perfect life, far from it. What it gives us is the opportunity to practice being a 4C woman. We have challenges, wonderful moments, scary moments, sadness and joy and through it all, we need to work on personal and emotional growth. As we do this, it becomes clear that this is hard work yet so rewarding. I can say that my identity, self-perception, and the words I used to describe myself in the past were cruel, negative and untrue. I took over for all those people who bullied me, criticized me and broke my spirit. It’s known by many as the Inner Critic, the one who is eager to point out each mistake and wrong choices to confirm the long ago held negative opinion of ourselves. It also acts as a protector of sorts. If I believe the Inner Critic’s negative definition of me, i.e., you’re not smart enough, then it has prepared me for rejection. It lessens the fear because I am prepared and expecting it. If I don’t feel like a 4C Woman, I won’t have to deal with the painful feelings that “might” occur. Believing the Inner Critic assures that emotional growth and positive change will not take place.

Statement 9 comes to mind whenever I think of the Inner Critic. He holds onto the past to victimize us and that is his joy. This is why Statement 5 is so important to practice, to believe, for it is how we learn to believe in ourselves, build our self-esteem, to develop a truthful, accurate definition of who we are TODAY! We know that if we make mistakes, it cannot destroy our identity. A mistake is a life lesson not a lifelong curse to keep us down.

The last words on the screen as the service ended today spoke to me, “It never gets easier, you just get better.” I mentioned this a few weeks ago that I thought life would be so much easier at my age but this is not the case. I have learned to handle the challenges better because I am a 4C woman, thanks to the guidance of WFS and my commitment to change - my thoughts and my actions. -WFS Member

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