March 4 Chap 4 v 4 TWELVE STEPPING WITH STRENGTH FROM THE PSALM

Don't sin by letting anger control you.Think about it overnight and remain silent .

(GODS BIG BOOK)

STEP 6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Well its been quite some time since I shared a message. This June will be fifteen years sober .So I am a recovery professional right ! " WRONG " Recently some trouble has come along in my Family and I thought I had this step memorized and in place but I find it funny how we can have it all together for so long then all of sudden anger manages to sneak out and before I knew it had control of everything .Like Dr. Jeckell and Mr.Hyde I went into 24 hour tantrum yelling at family creating a problem that did not exist .Paranoia crept in and the mind began racing coming up with scenario after scenario of what others are trying to do so they take advantage of other family members. I prayed and I prayed God please take this from me but my momentary madness kept me in my one man wrecking crew mode. After all the trouble , stress , and confusion I caused my loved ones my sanity eventually came back to visit bringing with him clarity .Shame and regret wanted  a shot but I will not go there ! I really need to look deep at this and try and find what it is about me that God wants me to change about me. I have been here before and a Pastor told me that I will continue to face the same struggles until I figure out the defect in my character that has to be removed. The only good that did come out of this was I had zero desire to self medicate !

Ecclesiastics 7:9 Be not hasty in your spirit to be angry: for anger rests in the bosom of fools.

(GODS BIG BOOK) By Joseph Dickerson