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Ask4Recovery – 6/8/13 – Why does an addict have such a short memory of the damages from using?by Ask4Recovery |
Hello friends! Today’s ‘Ask’…
"Why
does an addict have such a short memory of the damages from using? I'm
clean for weeks or months, stress up and craving comes out of nowhere. I
bargain, lose and then use. Why?" – A fellow Ask4Recovery member
That
is a wonderful question! It is pretty amazing where our minds can take
us. Where that destructive thinking can take us. How we can so easily
lose sight of those weeks or months or years that we have clean and the
addiction mindset can take over and bring us right back to the thought
that engaging in something destructive will make everything better.
Well, that is ‘old pattern’ thinking and thinking that is going to get
me nowhere! That is thinking that is not conducive to my recovery and I
need to shift that thinking when it creeps in. I have to release the
thought or craving and trust that my higher power will restore me to
sanity.
For
me, when those thoughts and that thinking come up, I have to take a
step back and ask myself, ‘What is really coming up for me?’ The alcohol
or the drug craving is part of the solution for the addict mindset, but
not part of the solution for the recovery mindset. Given I am in the
recovery mindset, this means sitting with those uncomfortable feelings
that I escaped from for so long. But by sitting with these feelings, I
am unlocking my true and authentic self and accepting myself on a whole
new playing field. I recently moved into my own apartment and my
destructive thinking is making an appearance. It is trying to take
advantage of me being on my own, telling me that I can’t do it, I’m not
good enough, and the list goes on. Now, I can acknowledge these
thoughts, realize they are not me, and release them because I know that a
thought or craving no longer directly translates to a self-sabotaging
action. It is so freeing!
I
also have to remember that I am not alone. My addict mind likes to make
me think that I am and I watch as my world can get smaller and smaller
until it is just me. But the reality is that there is a community of
people that truly care about me and when that craving comes up, I talk
about it, release the craving, and watch as that desire to use
diminishes. It takes honesty though. And willingness. But it works and
we can switch the selfish and ego-driven attitude to one of gratitude!
What do you do when a craving or urge comes up? How do you stay in recovery? Let us know and join the movement!
Sending love,
Lauren
P.S. Check out http://www.
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