Recovery Connections Network : Monday Thoughts 04/01/2019

Tuesday, April 2, 2019

Monday Thoughts 04/01/2019

“For many years before leaving on Safari, I carried the same old map around in my pocket. The map was torn and faded from so much use, but it was always there like a comfort to me when I needed to know where to go. The map had lands on it that might appear strange to some, but to others on our Safari, they are familiar places: The Republic of Resentment, the Nation of Negativity, the Icy Fjords of Fear, the Dark Seas of Self-Doubt, the atolls of Apathy. Numerous times I would tell myself that I wanted to journey to a different destination, but each time I pulled out that map, I wound up in the old familiar places.

"In a supreme act of faith, I began looking for a new map. One day, when I feared there were no more places to look, I saw a light on in a quiet little place and small sign said simply, WFS. The women were leaving on safari and said I was welcome to travel with them. But, in order to go, I had to surrender any maps I already had, as they would not serve me in the place I was going. I solemnly placed my map onto the warm fire and could see the ashes of the other maps that had been placed there…..it gave me courage. No one person had all of the pages, but together they were complete. I gathered together all that they have given me and, as if by magic, the separate pieces came together to form a single map. There were many choices of ways to go, but no matter which path I chose, they would all lead to the destinations I had been seeking: The Hallowed Hills of Happiness, the Estuaries of Enthusiasm, the Glaciers of Growth and Greatness and the Lands of Love.”

~~LC, An empowered 4C Woman

Statement #1

I have a life-threatening problem that once had me.

I now take charge of my life and my well-being.

I accept the responsibility.

The quote this week came from a retired WFS pamphlet, the WFS Sobriety Safari Series which was submitted by Nancy Cross and compiled by many, many, incredible 4C women. Below, you will find each section that was used in the series. Feel free to discuss and answer the questions in each section. (slightly edited for space)

Preparing for Departure: We all came to a point where our addictions became an issue. What was it like for you? What prepared you to want to change your life? What will you take with you and what will you leave behind?
Arriving in New Territory: What is it like as you touch down and land in this new place called Recovery? Why do we sometimes feel like we don’t fit and can’t understand the foreign language of love? What was the excitement/fear like for you?
Exploration: Mapping Your Journey: How did you find you way around? What did you use to get and keep your bearings? Do you dare go out among the lions, tigers and unfamiliar territory without some advice or map?
Obstacles & Unknown Dangers on the Recovery Trail: How will you respond to different obstacles in this new land? How will you respond to feelings of fear?
Survival in the Wild: What tools do we need? How can we keep from being eaten or getting lost?
From Darkness to Light: Sometimes the jungle is dark, or lands go on forever and we become tired. What keeps the sun at your back and hope in your heart on your sobriety safari?
Treasures Discovered: What have you found? What will you carry forever? How will you decide what to keep and what to leave for others to discover and see?
Understanding Our Discoveries: What does this trip mean to you? How will your legacy be changed by your adventure here? What are you learning about yourself and the world you live in?
Leaving a Trail for Future Travelers: How will people know where you have been? What legacy are you going to leave behind?
Returning to Civilization: What can we do to fit ourselves back into the world from which we always tried to escape? How will our families, friends, and co-workers benefit from what we have learned on this sobriety journey?

Hugzzz

Karen

Hi 4C Women,

I have the pamphlet of the "Safari" series and used it at the WFS meeting a few years ago. The questions provided a great deal of discussion and a lot of personal insight was gained from sharing and uncovering our journeys in sobriety/recovery. My favorite question was from Chapter 9 regarding the legacy I am leaving behind.

It brought back the memory of a member in the group from several years ago who had one year's sobriety when she sadly passed away from an undiagnosed heart problem. However, what she did in that one year was phenomenal. The legacy she left behind was one of resilience, courage, commitment, fearlessness, loyalty and a trusted wife, mother and friend.

That has stayed with me all these years and it has kept me grounded when the tough times have confronted me, as it does each of us. Amid the struggles, I keep that question in my mind - how will I be remembered? Even with the mistakes I've made, I hope I can show that I am learning from them, that I didn't collapse completely and am still willing to learn more about my reasons for my current choices.

While I have remained sober, I know there is still emotional and spiritual growth that needs to take place. That's okay with me because in my heart, that is the legacy I want to leave behind - that no matter what, I am willing to continue on this learning and healing journey.

I am feeling very melancholy today as I have been packing my daughter's house and coming across so much wonderful history and realizing how much has changed. I yearn for those fun times yet that is not what today, this time, is bringing. While the tears flow, I am grateful for having those fond memories and always hopeful for better times ahead. This is what WFS has taught me and mostly that I am not alone and will make it through with the support, encouragement and love of my WFS sisters.

We are bonded together in taking responsibility for our lives and our well-being on this journey.

- A beautiful 4C Woman

WFS Annual Weekend Conference 2019

Don't miss this workshop at this year's conference !

Paying It Forward: Being a WFS Moderator

This is an information workshop! Positive tips, solutions, and encouragement in leading or getting a WFS meeting started will be provided. This will be a sharing of experiences as well. Our goal is to keep the f2f meetings active and build confidence in creating new ones.

Some of the topics will include:

Finding a free space
How to promote the meeting
What do you do if no one shows up
Handling disruptive members
Understanding that some women aren’t ready and it is not your responsibility
How to handle a woman who constantly relapses
What makes a successful group (pg 46 in Moderator’s Manual)
Following guidelines for moderating a meeting
What would be helpful in a training video
Sharing one positive tip

Susie M (SueBee12), Peer Presenter

Susie has been a Certified Moderator for the WFS New Life Program for 19 years and currently serves as the organization’s Vice President. She found WFS on what she thought was her last chance to stop drinking. “If I didn’t find something along my line of philosophy then I’d just forget it. Not try anymore. Lucky for me, I found Dr. Jean Kirkpatrick’s book ‘Goodbye Hangovers, Hello Life’ in my local library.” Susie believes that she was lucky to have a meeting only 15 minutes from her home and credits the New Life Program with saving her life. She feels that her long-term success in the program (over 20 years of continuous sobriety!) has been supported by being a CM. “The two meetings I moderate are for me, too. I get back way more every week than I could have ever imagined.”

Dee W (GrandmomDee63), Peer Presenter

Dee has served as a Certified Moderator for WFS face-to-face meetings for over 25 years and was the President of WFS from 2006 to 2017. She helps with member responses to Monday Thoughts and continues to serve as an Honorary Board Member.