Most people know the
holidays can be a period of emotional highs and lows. Loneliness,
anxiety, happiness and sadness are common feelings, sometimes
experienced in startling succession. The bad news is the holiday blues
can trigger relapse for people recovering from alcoholism and other drug
addiction. The good news is the blues can be remedied by planning
ahead.
Why do the blues hit during
this otherwise festive season? Doing too much or too little and being
separated from loved ones at this special time can lead to sadness
during the holiday season. Many recovering people associate the holidays
with memories of overindulgence, perhaps of big benders that resulted
in relationship problems or great personal losses.
People experience feelings
of melancholy, sadness and grief tied to holiday recollections. Unlike
clinical depression, which is more severe and can last for months or
years, those feelings are temporary. Anyone experiencing major symptoms
of depression, such as persistent sadness, anxiety, guilt or
helplessness; changes in sleep patterns; and a reduction in energy and
libido, should seek help from a mental health professional.
Whether you're in recovery
or not, developing a holiday plan to help prevent the blues, one that
will confront unpleasant memories before they threaten your holiday
experience. Your plan should include improved self-care, enhanced
support from others, and healthy ways to celebrate. Here are a few
suggestions to achieve a happy, sober holiday season:
Good self-care is vital. Remember to slow down.
Take some quiet time each day and work on an attitude of gratitude.
Plan relaxation and meditation into your day, even for a few minutes, no
matter how busy you are. Relax your standards and reduce overwhelming
demands and responsibilities.
Don't overindulge.
Go easy on the holiday sweets and follow a balanced diet. Monitor your
intake of caffeine, nicotine and sugar. Exercise regularly to help
maintain your energy level amid a busier schedule. Don't try to do too
much. Get plenty of sleep. Fatigue is a stressor. Maintain some kind of
schedule and plan ahead; don't wait until the last minute to purchase
gifts or prepare to entertain.
Enhance your support system.
Holidays are a good time to reach out more frequently to your
therapist, sponsor, spiritual advisor, or support group. If you're in
recovery, spend time with fellow recovering people. Let others help you
realize your personal limits. Learn to say "no" in a way that is
comfortable for you.
Find new ways to celebrate.
Create some new symbols and rituals that will help redefine a joyful
holiday season. You might host a holiday gathering for special
recovering friends and/or attend celebrations of your Twelve Step group.
Avoid isolation and spend time with people you like who are not
substance users. Don't expose yourself to unnecessary temptations, such
as gatherings where alcohol is the center of entertainment. If there are
people who have a negative influence on you, avoid them.
Focus on your recovery program.
Holidays are also an important time to focus on your recovery program.
For example, ask, "What am I working on in my program now?" Discuss this
with your sponsor.
Release your resentments.
Resentment has been described as allowing a person you dislike to live
in your head, rent-free. Resentments that gain steam during the holidays
can be disastrous for anyone, especially recovering people. The Big
Book of "Alcoholics Anonymous" refers to resentment as the No. 1
offender, or the most common factor in failed sobriety.
Holidays may also be a time
to evaluate your spirituality and find a personal way to draw support
from the spirit of the season. Return the holidays to a spiritual base,
and stress the power of unselfish giving.
Recovery is serious work,
but it is also important to have fun. Laugh a little and a little more.
Start seeing the humor in those things that annoy you. Take from the
holiday season what is important for you and leave the rest.
