IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME FALL

Dear Valued Member,

I had to share this with you my Addict's Mom Family..

Shared on the Addict's Mom Facebook Group reshared with permission https://www.facebook.com/groups/theaddictsmom/

IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME FALL

IF you love me let me fall all by myself. Don’t try to spread a net out to catch me, don’t throw a pillow under my ass to cushion the pain so I don’t have to feel it, don’t stand in the place I am going to land so that you can break the fall, (allowing yourself to get hurt instead of me).
Let me fall as far down as my addiction is g...oing to take me, let me walk the valley alone all by myself, let me reach the bottom of the pit....trust that there is a bottom there somewhere even if you can’t see it.

The sooner you stop saving me from myself, stop rescuing me, trying to fix my broken-ness, trying to understand me to a fault, enabling me.....The sooner you allow me to feel the loss and consequences, the burden of my addiction on my shoulders and not yours....the sooner I will arrive....and on time....just right where I need to be...me, alone all by myself in the rubble of the lifestyle I lead...resist the urge to pull me out because that will only put me back at square one.
If I am allowed to stay at the bottom and live there for a while, I am free to get sick of it on my own, free to begin to want out, free to look for a way out, and free to plan how I will climb back up to the top. In the beginning as I start to climb out....I just might slide back down, but doesn’t worry I might have to hit bottom a couple more times before I make it out safe and sound. Don’t you see?? Don’t you know?? You can’t do this for me...I have to do it for myself, but if you are always breaking the fall how am I ever supposed to feel the pain that is part of the driving force to want to get well. It is my burden to carry, not yours. I know you love me and that you mean well and a lot of what you do is because you don’t know what to do and you act from your heart and from knowledge of what is best for me....but if you truly love me, let me go my own way, make my own choices be they bad or good. Don’t clip my wings before I can learn to fly....nudge me out of your safety net....trust the process.

Where else you can find the Addict's Mom?


Just a reminder you can find the Addict's Mom on Facebook



Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/theaddictsmom/

Facebook Fan Page https://www.facebook.com/#!/addictsmom (please like there is so much power in numbers, together we can make huge changes)

Also check out our blog:

www.addictionandfamilies.org



The Addict's Mom is dedicated to helping mothers of addicts heal on their journey to becoming healthy addict's moms..



Much love,

Barbara


Visit The Addict's Mom at: http://addictsmom.com/?xg_source=msg_mes_network

Ask4Recovery – 6/12/13 – How do I deal with ‘living life on life’s terms’ in recovery?

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Ask4Recovery – 6/12/13 – How do I deal with ‘living life on life’s terms’ in recovery? by Ask4Recovery



Hello friends! Today’s ‘Ask’…

How do I deal with ‘living life on life’s terms’ in recovery?

This has been a hard concept to grasp and I am learning something new about it each day. For 26 years, I lived life on MY terms. My way or the highway. I wanted things done exactly when I wanted them done. I wanted an answer exactly when I wanted an answer. I wanted control. And when things did not go my way, I went into my selfish and self-destructive thinking and engaged in some form of maladaptive behavior to disconnect and numb out. My form of control.

Now that I am no longer active in my addictions and a paradigm shift has happened in the way I perceive people, places, and things, I am beginning to live life on life’s terms. This means accepting things exactly as they are. Not resisting. Not controlling. Acknowledging my mind and my thoughts. Accepting them. Not acting impulsively, which my mind still likes to convince me to do at times. And making a choice to do the best thing I can possibly do in that moment. And most of the time, it goes against what my previous patterns and habits were. But with those previous habits I was living a life of self-destruction, sadness, anger, and disconnection. So my way was obviously not working. I now have a connection to something bigger than myself. A life force that is guiding me and connecting me to my true purpose. My reason for being here. When I was active in my addictions, I was soulless. Spiritually and emotionally bankrupt. And that all happened on ‘Lauren’s terms.’ Today, ‘Life’s terms’ is a whole lot more fun and fulfilling so I am coming back to life, one day at a time!

How do you live life on life’s terms in recovery? What has worked for you? Let us know and join the movement!

Sending love,

Lauren

P.S. Check out my friends over at http://www.sobernation.com, the #1 National Recovery Resources and Addiction Treatment Centers Database on the internet. They are spreading the message!
Ask4Recovery | June 12, 2013 at 11:03 am | Categories: Uncategorized | URL: http://wp.me/p3wKKk-50


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Angst | Renew Everyday

Angst | Renew Everyday

 

June 12

Psalms 74:20
Have respect unto the covenant: for the dark places of the earth are full of the habitations of cruelty.

A new government had seemed the best solution. The overthrow had taken place a new government was installed, and then something had gone wrong. The new president sat enthroned in a palatial estate, where no one could get in to see him. The proposals of the new majority went unheeded. The oppressors had not been eradicated, they had merely changed faces and places. The people were betrayed, and the cruelty continued.

 

Broken promises. They litter the land of most countries. Trust is offered, then it is trampled on. A man or woman's word is only as good as the individual chooses to make it. Thank God that He is constant and true. His covenants are eternal. God never turns from His people, and they never need to fear that they will be forgotten. Let us work in our lives to copy God's commitment to covenant in the promises that we make.

 

Prayer: Make my word was good as the finest gold, dear Lord. Help me to accept the fact that I am lied to each day, and to forgive those who offer up the lies. Amen.

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Scientists: Research Could Lead to Lower-Dose Painkillers, Reducing Dependence

By Join Together Staff | June 11, 2013 | Leave a comment | Filed in Prescription Drugs & Research

A team of scientists at the University of Michigan say they have identified a new approach to pain therapy that could lead to lower-dose painkillers, which may reduce the risk of dependence.
Patients taking common painkillers such as hydrocodone or morphine tend to develop a tolerance for the medications, which leads them to take higher doses for pain relief. This increases the risk of harmful side effects and dependency, HealthCanal reports.
Opioid painkillers used for moderate to severe pain bind to receptors on nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord to prevent pain. “We have for the first time discovered compounds that bind to an alternative site on the nerve opioid receptors and that have significant potential to enhance the drug’s positive impact without increasing negative side effects,” researcher John Traynor, PhD, said in a news release. The compounds potentially could work with the body’s own natural painkillers to manage pain, he stated.
He noted the research is still in the early stages. “This opens the door to developing pain relief medications that require lower doses to be effective, helping address the serious issues of tolerance and dependence that we see with conventional pain therapy,” he added.
The findings are published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America.

TODAYS ASK Ask4Recovery – 6/11/13 – How do I set proper boundaries in my recovery?by Ask4Recovery

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Ask4Recovery – 6/11/13 – How do I set proper boundaries in my recovery?by Ask4Recovery



Hello friends! Today’s Ask…

How do I set proper boundaries in my recovery?

Ah, the question of boundaries. This can be a hard one. The definition of boundary is ‘something that indicates or fixes a limit or extent.’ I had no idea what boundaries were before I started on the road to recovery. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. The concept of setting boundaries was a foreign concept for me. They were blurred and nonexistent. When I was active in my addictions, people were like toys and I used them to manipulate to get exactly what I wanted from them. Ultimately, that is how I felt about myself as well. I was so far from living my truth and constantly manipulated and rationalized the destruction caused by my addictions. My loved ones bore the brunt of this. I expected them to be at my beckon call when I needed them and then blocked them out of my life as soon as I got what I wanted from them. I had no respect or regard for others, but most importantly, did not have any respect for myself. I had no identity and thus, had the inability to set proper boundaries, to assert myself, to express my feelings, or to effectively communicate. My relationships became enmeshed and my self-worth was very low.

Throughout my recovery I have learned what it means to set boundaries. I have learned that I can’t force my will onto others. I have also learned that it is okay to say no and not exert myself in every capacity to appease others. I have learned the meaning of ‘accepting others limitations.’ There are still times when I want someone to do something the way I want them to. Or to react a way I want them to. These expectations are just resentments waiting to happen. With the concept of boundaries comes the concept of acceptance. Acceptance of the person you are and honoring that person in each moment. With that honor comes a sense of identity and the ability to set proper boundaries. This is all a work in progress and I am learning something new about my boundary setting each day. The difference is now, I am aware and have the self-worth to set effective boundaries. Without admittance of powerlessness and surrendering to my addictions, none of this would have been possible!

How do you set proper boundaries? What has worked for you in your recovery? Let us know and join the movement!

Sending love,

Lauren

Ask4Recovery | June 11, 2013 at 10:57 am | Categories: Uncategorized | URL:http://wp.me/p3wKKk-4W

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