August 26, 2015
Dear WFS Members and Friends,
It is with such great sadness to share with you that our beloved fourcwoman, Nancy Cross, has passed away last night. Her increasing ill health in the last few years had taken so much of her energy and time away from the WFS forum and chat room that she created and loved so very much. She had unrelenting devotion and commitment to getting Women for Sobriety online in a format that would bring together women from all across the world to share and connect with one another as they traveled the road to recovery using the WFS “New Life” Program as their guide.
Nancy became WFS’s “Internet Liaison” from the very moment she was able to set up chat room meetings way back in 1998. As a member of the Women for Sobriety Board of Directors and a Certified Moderator, leading face-to-face meetings in Cincinnati, Ohio, she worked very closely with the WFS office and the board members to create the requirements needed for women to become Certified Chat Leaders and creating the guidelines and rules to participate on the WFS forum and in chats. Nancy became WFS’s first CCL. I remember way back in 1998 when she first told me about this social site on AOL, where you type messages back and forth in real time, and we both checked it out and thought it was the most fantastic thing on the World Wide Web! Soon the first official WFS chat was underway on AOL, with 25 women attending! There have been many changes and locations since that time…from Yahoo groups to MSN to our current location through a website company dedicated to online forum and chat software. And because of Nancy’s passion and patience and unrelenting enthusiasm to help women learn about WFS and gain a foundation into recovery, we currently have over 10,000 women registered at the WFS forum site: http://www.
Please be reassured that her legacy will continue on! With Nancy’s blessing, prior to her passing, the WFS office will take on the responsibility of managing the online community; and, with the support of the WFS Board of Directors, embrace the forum and chat as an official part of the Women for Sobriety organization. I have been working with the Chat Leaders and designated members of the online community to insure that the message boards, chat meetings, and the online community will remain a positive place to gather and share in a nurturing environment, learning and growing as women embrace the WFS “New Life” Program into their sober lives.
To honor Nancy’s devotion and love for the online community, WFS Chat Leader, Julie Lambie will be creating a message board on the forum devoted to Nancy, called “The Wisdom of fourcwoman”. She will pull together all of Nancy’s posts over the years, like her Messages, so the past and current online members can read and continue to be inspired by Nancy’s wisdom and experience with using our program.
We will also dedicate an upcoming edition of the WFS newsletter, Sobering Thoughts, for all who wish to share a special moment in time you shared with Nancy or remembering the first chat meeting with her…or how she may have helped you through a difficult time….share with us how the wisdom of her words or her gentle voice reached you at a time you needed it most. Please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with your reflections and I will gather them through to .
I have received information on her funeral service and her obituary; also for those who wish to leave an online message for her family, please visit this site My husband and I will be traveling to the service to share our love and respect for Nancy and to be able to, at some level, express to her family how much we treasured her as a member of WFS, a friend, a mentor, an inspiration to never give up hope and to try one more time. We also want to reconnect with her face-to-face group members and share in their grief as they work through this difficult time. Please join me in holding thoughts of love and care for her family and her devoted group members; especially for a dear WFS sister who continues to lead Nancy’s meetings and has been such a close and caring friend all these years; a bond of friendship that is now experiencing a great loss.
We will be forever grateful to Nancy for her inspiration to start this huge movement for WFS to get ‘online’. Every one of us in WFS still feels that same empowering positive energy that is created when there is a gathering of WFS women on the internet. And, so, her loss is so very hard for us to take in our hearts and to accept. She has touched so many lives; she has made a lasting positive imprint on our memories. We have not lost our fourcwoman; her spirit lives on with our online community and in the words and stories she has posted over the years.
Her family has shared with us that in lieu of flowers, sending a donation to WFS in Nancy’s memory would be welcomed. In fact, your donations will help us to continue supporting her dream to see the online community live on and thrive for many years to come. If you also wish to send a sympathy card to her family, please send it to the WFS office and I will be honored to pass that along to them. And, if you wish to attend Nancy’s service, please let me know so that I may share more details of our gathering.
Rest in peace, beautiful fourcwoman; thank you for your kindness, your generosity and your loving service to WFS, to all of us. I will miss you, my friend.
In deepest sympathy,
Becky Fenner, WFS Director
Women for Sobriety, Inc.
PO Box 618
Quakertown, PA 18951
To send a donation using a credit card, please visit our catalog page at: www.wfscatalog.org/Donations_
Thursday, August 27, 2015
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
August 25 CHP 107 v 29 TWELVE STEPPING WITH STRENGTH FROM THE PSALMS
HE CALMS THE STORM , SO ITS WAVES ARE STILL !
(GODS BIG BOOK)
STEP 11 - Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
Being a long term Recovery member does not mean I have it all under control and I am exempt from Relapse . It does mean that if I am willing to pray trust and work with GOD I will have no fear when the storms of life come. In this verse GOD is making a Promise that HE WILL CALM THE STORM! GOD has kept HIS promises 2000 years plus so you can count on HIM. Step Eleven does not mean that your a professional RECOVER EEE , it means you have been broken and humbled in ways most folks will never experience and you have developed a Relationship with your creator GOD ! Continue to trust HIM and when life Hits the fan don't get cocky remember your pain and pray . BE STILL AND KNOW HE is your GOD and HE will CARRY you THROUGH !
GOD, GRACE ,AND GRATITUDE !
1 Thessalonians 5:16-19 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit.
(GODS BIG BOOK) By Joseph Dickerson
Monday, August 24, 2015
“Look for little ways to express yourself more creatively and differently. Don’t aim too high and get discouraged. Start with small things. Let yourself take a step that’s fun and relatively easy and enjoyable. Then appreciate yourself for that. If you keep taking small steps, you will end up being exactly where you need to be. Have fun with it. What it really boils down to is this: You can do things in the same old way you’ve always done them, which is safe and secure but also a bit dull and boring, or you can try something new and different. The reason we don’t try new things is because our protector selves are afraid they are not safe for us. But if you reassure those parts of ourselves and don’t try to do too many new things at once, we can create more excitement and fun in our lives.”--Awakening: A Daily Guide to Conscious Living by Shakti Gawain
Statement #12, “I am a competent woman and have much to give life.”
This is what I am and I shall know it always.
+ Karen’s Perspective +
One of the earliest and harder transitions for me to experience in sobriety and my New Life has been my concept of fun. When under the influence, everything felt fun and exciting; but, today, I know that that was a complete lie. Alcohol just covered up my feelings, unleashed drama and prevented me from experiencing reality. My self-esteem took a direct hit. I needed to relearn and redefine my concept of fun.
Sobriety and Statement #12 in action assist me in redefining many areas of my life as well as redirecting my encouraging self. A great example is how I have changed how I speak to myself about alcohol; instead of urging myself to drink, I encourage growth in sobriety and my New Life.
Another example was last year when I set a goal of taking a watercolor class and, though initially I felt quite unsure of myself, it turned out to be an exciting new adventure. It was so enjoyable. Not only did I learn some valuable techniques, but I also made new friends and instant connections. Again I proved to myself that I am a capable, competent woman who has so very much to give life and who now has a new exciting and creative outlet! Hugzzz, Karen
+ Dee’s Insights +
Hi 4C Women, I have been talking about fun for way too long and not working enough at achieving it. Fortunately, I do have some fun, in spite of myself. However, I have come to realize that just like most wants and needs, even fun requires commitment, time and some planning. As Karen said, and I agree, drinking seemed to provide fun, but who truly knows that it is not authentic until you stop drinking and realize the difference between the alcohol-induced fun and the spontaneous, joyful sober fun? Why couldn’t I have fun without having a drink to lower my inhibitions, to allow myself to be silly? All I can say is that sobriety taught me that I can laugh even harder and remember it the next day. Heck, I know what I’m doing every moment. I don’t feel self-conscious anymore about being silly and I highly recommend trying it!
Now some of you might be wondering why anyone would say that drinking at times provided fun when we are talking about sobriety. I learned in WFS that I needed to be honest with myself and others because it would be a hindrance to personal growth to say otherwise. Sober, I learned that it became a habit to drink in order to have what I considered fun, to be at ease. For some people, the idea of denying how alcohol calmed nervousness in new situations or helped make conversations easier around new people, denies their truth and might delay their willingness to accept that small piece of truth and find other healthier ways to have fun, to socialize and to be comfortable in new situations and around new people.
Acceptance allows change and that is what WFS is all about. Not only did I learn to have fun sober, I built my self-esteem and felt pure freedom to be me. This is who I am and I shall know it always. –Dee
Thank you, Karen and Dee, for your words of encouragement and inspiration to start off our week! ~Becky Fenner, WFS Director
Sunday, August 23, 2015
Saturday, August 22, 2015
Friday, August 21, 2015
I am so excited our Fed Up Rally Bracelets are ready...they are beautiful and they only cost 10 dollars. I would love to see every TAM Sister wearing one.
Purple signifies we are FED UP and Red signifies We are Strong Mommas who are ready and willing to "Share Without Shame."
I just ordered mine and one for someone else. I hope you join me as we unite in this most important RALLY!!!
Will I meet you at the Fed Up Rally, you will know I am a TAM sister because I will be wearing the Fed UP/TAM bracelet below.
Much love to all addict's moms and their families ...Barbara
Visit The Addict's Mom at: http://addictsmom.com/?xg_