Recovery Connections Network

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” ~~Helen Keller

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” ~~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“How do you spell love?”~Piglet ----- “You don’t spell it. You feel it.”~Pooh

Statement #7

“Love can change the course of my world.”

Caring is all-important.

Before sobriety and New Life, love was something I craved. Love felt so distant, love felt confusing and I felt unworthy of receiving love. In order to satisfy that craving and experience the love I so desperately chased, it became easy to take dangerous risks, or allow abusive behavior while isolating away from life. Addiction now had access and easily took hold.

From our Program booklet, “Learning to love ourselves and others can be very challenging. We may distrust others and fear being vulnerable. We may be unable to accept love because we doubt it is valid or deserved. As our self-image improves, we learn how to accept love and affirm we are worthy of love.” Sobriety and Statement #7 in action create a portal for love to grow and flourish. Embracing sobriety and recovery is akin to a daily love letter sent straight to the heart declaring “I love you.”

Today, with hindsight and the practice of Statement #7, I understand that love was always present. Chasing, hiding, or avoiding were just tactics which kept me from feeling love; all I had to do was slow down and feel the beautiful experience that love is.

Here are 4 ways to give yourself love:

1. Learn, embrace and use your strengths: Discover/uncover strengths and use them daily.

2. The word “no” is a complete sentence: Setting boundaries is great self-care.

3. Life is meant to be felt: Experience your feelings and express them in healthier ways.

4. Give up comparisons: You are uniquely YOU. No one has lived your life, why compare?

Hugzzz

Karen

Hi 4C Women,

I love the 4 ways to give yourself love that Karen shared in this message. Giving love has always been a lot easier for me than receiving love. A question arose in our group about this Statement - "What is the way you like love to be shown?" I thought about that and found there are several answers depending on the person and the situation. It could be a simple thank you in appreciation for something I did or offering help without my asking because the person saw the need. Recognizing what fills your love tank is crucial. It can prevent you from seeking love, as the song says, "in all the wrong places." I know I did that for a long time. I am so grateful that I learned about self-care in WFS and therapy.

Self-care taught me to first love and respect myself, learn to be my own best friend, set healthy boundaries, stop the comparison game and accept me for who I was at any given moment as I worked on my sobriety.

Here are some additional questions to ponder:

1. How can I practice more compassionate self-care?

2. Who else would benefit from loving myself even a little bit more?

3. How open am I to receiving love?

4. Have you learned to trust yourself and others in receiving love to lessen the fear of rejection?

5. Are you struggling with being a people-pleaser?

6. Have you learned to respect and value yourself, forgiving and healing from your past?

7. Who is part of your love circle?

I encourage you to take the time to answer these questions. Perhaps you would be willing to share your answers in a group meeting or privately with someone you feel safe to trust with your deepest feelings. Hopefully these answers will guide you in living/practicing Statement #7 to its fullest.

Bonded in compassionate self-care,

4C WFS Member

Don't miss this workshop at the

2018 WFS

Annual Weekend Conference!

June 8-10 in Center Valley, PA

Book Oragami

Finding activities we enjoy is important in recovery. We are encouraged to explore our creative self. Book Origami is fun and easy and requires a minimum of materials (an old book, a pencil, a ruler). In this workshop you will learn how to fold the pages in the book so that the end result is a 3D butterfly that you can display as a piece of art.

Book folding has been around for a few years now, but only recently has it really taken off. This type of crafting resonates with upcylers, because it’s economical and different. It is also very easy, so for those who feel they are artistically challenged, this is a great way to make something fun and beautiful – and boost self-esteem!

Nancy M/Nanserz (Peer Presenter) - Nancy has been sober for over 3 years using the WFS Program. She has rediscovered her creative self in recovery and enjoys sharing things she has learned with others. An active member of the online forums, she can primarily be found participating with new members (aka "Newbies") in their connections group in addition to her Sunday night chat sessions. She will be assisted by lisa4r.